grief and disappointment.

how do you explain this feeling?

losing someone who's not even close to you and whom you barely know.

it's not even your fault, or is it? would going there have made any difference? it would most likely have done nothing to change the outcome, but maybe it would not have been your fault then.

but it's too late now.

it's gone.

when looking back you can see now how being there may have been better.

why did you not think that it was urgent enough to drop everything and go? there were other excuses...? and it seemed that everyone else had their own reasons of not being able to go either. you should have consulted earlier.

but no, you didn't.

then it was too late.

no one knows what you're feeling. to them, it's just something that happened. why do you feel so bad about it?

now you have to face the consequences. will they blame you for not being there? despite everything, their repeated asking and your repeated persuasions against it. the unintended delay is most likely the last straw.

will you ever be able to face them now? will they ever come back to see you? and what will they say?

feeling like all the blame is on you. YOU.

you are the boss here...and you let them down.

YOU LET THEM DOWN.

when they trusted you, you broke your promise.

the standard of care - poor.

what kind of service provider is that then?

how will the next person feel if they knew about this? will they even come here in the first place? and what will they be thinking when they meet YOU?

you are such a disappointment.



sometimes I just don't want to do this anymore.