it's been a rough time recently, and it's not really anyone's fault but my own...let's analyse myself.
dealing with my emotions has always been a struggle for me. I didn't know how to express myself well, previously being a very introverted person when around people. but it was a different matter at home, guess I basically behaved however I wanted to a certain extent. and I don't blame my parents for how I am.
when I grew up and left home I became more open and "friendly" according to most people, but majority of the time were superficial friendships. only a select few I felt I could trust and be myself around - they were the ones who saw the other side of me. (and if you read some past blog entries...some have been bad rants)
over the years, things have gotten from bad to worse, to a point where my over-reaction to things have had a negative impact on other people. and in the past few months it's been surfacing a great deal.
I guess I could make a thousand and one excuses for what I did, but at the end of the day, searching myself, there's something inside of me that's
today's message spoke directly into my situation...it's not a coincidence, but a God-incident.
HOODWINKED - DID GOD REALLY SAY? - message by Pastor Leo Hanssen, Majestic Church 17th Oct 2010
- there are many ways to be deceived, and you need a revelation/awakening to see that people are deceiving you.
- deception causes you to harden your heart, which leads to sin, which thereafter leads to further hardening of your heart towards people and God.
- deception makes us question, then sows doubt into our thoughts which are NOT GOD, which then become evil actions.
- deception also adds to the truth. and the end of deception is death.
- deception is not an instant killer - it eats away at you. one day you realise and feel as though you're so far away, until revelation hits.
- the enemy tries to tell us who he thinks we are, BUT GOD HAS ALREADY SAID WHO WE REALLY ARE.
there is a need to soften my heart.
it's still not too late...
what am I going to do about it?
anyway, that aside, share something with the men out there:
The 5 Pillars of Manhood - by Pastor Jaeson Ma
k0k s3n w4i says:
i read the "5 Pillars of Manhood" and i don't think it went down all that well with me. there is a slight tang of male chauvinism that i detected and to confirm my suspicions, i showed it to a friend of mine, who happens to be a girl and anglican.
she said it best, so i'll just quote her,
"they implied that traits like leadership, integrity and courage are inherently male qualities. are women not courageous? does women lack integrity or are unable to provide? is there 5 pillars of womanhood that will also have these same values? and the assertion that a woman will always recognise a man as the leader in a relationship and requires him to make her decisions for her is pure alpha male bravado. i want a partner, not a patriarch."
February 03, 2011 4:46 am