random ramblings.

the bed beckons...kinda tired. had a really random dream/nightmare last night. the scene was so vivid and detailed it felt so real. and it went on for the whole time I was asleep...=S had a hard time falling asleep, then dreaming about surgery done on this person was just...*shiver* so gross and sadistic it felt more like a post-mortem? almost like watching some horror movie...argh. shan't elaborate more cos I just wanna forget it. freaky.

ANYWAY. finally it's friday. and tonight I ate so much food that I think I overate. =S which is just...unacceptable. I was hungry, I cooked, I had dinner. then a while later I was hungry again, and I ate again. and the cycle goes on...there just doesn't seem to be a connection from my stomach to my brain telling it to STOP...! so what if I exercise...as long as input>output nothing else matters. bleah.

anyway. went walkabout/shopping in Riccarton Mall after class today. bought a new CD, The Bird And The Bee Sides/The Nashville Tennis EP by Relient K. listening to it at the moment, I've taken to these contemporary Christian artists/bands/music. and I think I need new music quite frequently to sustain my interest because I tend to listen to the new CDs I get over and over again when I get them, then very soon I need something new. need to limit how many CDs I buy in a month...

anyway. realised that after 2 weeks of O&G, I've become a more "mature" student? in a sense that I've seen more clinically sensitive things than what I had in 4th year (for obvious reasons) and I've asked more personal questions than ever before. watched internal examinations being done on women, asked women about gynaecological stuff and their history of intimate relations, watched a woman give birth, among other things. I can now say out words I previously felt shy about saying, which I suppose can be said to be an "acquired skill". it's a good thing I guess...

anyway. I'm trying to be a better colleague to my classmates. because we miss out on classes while we're away at various attachments, the notes I take down I offered to share them with those who were not here. allowed them to photocopy what I wrote, although not entirely complete but at least it's something. I'm just hoping that for the times when I'm away, someone would kindly offer me theirs...it shouldn't be a competition, we need to help each other to pass...

anyway. I talk a lot. actually, if I think a little harder I have a lot more to say. sometimes it's nice to talk to people, but other times just typing it out will suffice. or not. but whatever it is, it's better to have some form of outlet than to keep everything inside, isn't it? hmm...

all the above nonsense...that's just another day in my life. wonder how interesting one would rate this? on a scale of 0-10, 0 being boring, 10 being exciting, where would it be? (this scale thing is too much of an influence from asking patients questions requiring them to rate their pain on a similar scale...need a life outside of the hospital...)

anyway. it's the last anyway. anyway has been overused in this post. ANYWAY...shall sleep now, goodnight world.



searching the vastness for a sight of your shadow...